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Friday, February 8, 2019

Changing Your Mindset


Hello! This semester in the TRAIN-STEM Scholar class here at West campus, we are reading and discussing the text Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck. The book, based on decades of research conducted by the author, basically boils down to the following credo: YOU can determine your own success by choosing the right attitude and sticking with it. Now, I know that sounds over-simplified, and it IS. But I’ve only got limited space here to talk about 288 pages of pretty great techniques that you can use to change your life, so bear with me. The book is actually a whole lot better than my meme-ready phrase indicates. I have actually used it to help me gain a better perspective on life, improve my grades, and generally just feel better this about everything this year.

One of the central messages of the book is about how we can fall into the trap of having a fixed mindset. This is when we form opinions, attitudes, and patterns of behavior about something and refuse to change our mind about it, despite evidence to the contrary and despite a fixed mindset (or opinion) being detrimental to our well-being and personal growth (sounds a lot like the nasty political climate right now, doesn’t it?).

The book recommends that we choose a growth mindset instead. All this means is that we have to be open to new ideas, new perspectives, and new evidence that challenges our pre-conceived notions and habits. Instead of just falling into a rut, getting comfortable, and refusing to try/think about new things, we’ve got to let ourselves get uncomfortable and be open to learning, in every day, in every situation.

I’d like to tell you about a time that I demonstrated a growth mindset, before even I knew there was such a thing, and how it helped me.

I had a serious problem a while back with a class that I absolutely hated. Organic Chemistry. I LOATHED this class, folks- it was at 8 AM (already way too early for me), chemistry is historically my worst subject, I was crammed in lecture hall with 120 kids (I really, really, really don’t like crowds), and keeping track of reactions and nomenclature was making me nuts. Every day I had to go to this class, I just wanted to shoot myself (figuratively, not literally).

About mid-semester, I felt I was literally DROWNING in in aldehydes, ketones, amines, and hydroxyls. I had a “D” grade and was headed for an “F”. I felt like a total failure and thought I might have to quit.

Before I did that, I decided to give myself some space from all the stress for a minute. I put all the homework away, got into my pj’s, and binge-watched Netflix for two days just to clear my head. When I had calmed down and had forgotten for a minute how ticked off I was about almost failing the class, I felt a thousand times better. At that moment, I decided I should sit down, write down everything I was feeling & thinking about O-Chem (including my hopes, emotions, and fears), and see if I could recognize any patterns or connect any dots that would maybe help me see a way out of the problem.

After writing down my thoughts and reviewing the paper, I recognized again that, yeah, I HATED O-Chem. But why? None of the reasons I already mentioned seemed to make sense-in fact, they seemed kind of petty. But when I got to the emotions and, specifically, fears, I had written down, it occurred to me that I was actually afraid. Afraid of O-Chem. Afraid of failing it. Afraid that I was just too stupid to “get” it. Afraid to ask for help, because then people would know that I was lost.

It was really tough to admit that I was afraid of tiny little functional groups-heck, it was embarrassing. But once I got honest with myself, figuring a way out of my problem got easier. I realized that I was going to have to ask for help (something I never did). I realized that I was going to have to put in extra hours studying (something I wasn’t used to doing a lot of). And I realized that I might have to accept that I wasn’t going to get an “A” in the class, but if I worked hard enough I could probably at least pass it. In this situation, my absolute best effort might only produce a “C”. These were ALL hard pills to swallow for me, but I wanted my degree more than I wanted to give up. So, I swallowed them.  And in doing so, I stepped out of a fixed mindset that was holding me back from succeeding and stepped into my future.

I wish I could say that this story has a fairy-tale ending. I wish I could say that I turned it around and got an “A”. But I didn’t. I scored a “C” in O-Chem. But I fought harder for that “C” than I had ever fought for any other grade, so I was pretty proud of it. I am still proud of it. I learned a lot from that experience, and for that I will always be grateful. Plus, in the end that one “C’” didn’t really do much damage to my GPA, lol.

It’s tough stepping outside of yourself and taking an objective look at your actions, behaviors, and attitudes. Being honest about your mindset and your approach to life can be scary. It can even be embarrassing to admit when you need help. But if we want to grow as humans, sometimes we have to step out of our comfort zones, face our fears, and change our attitudes.

I did- and I changed for the better as a result.

Thank you for reading my blog. Have a great semester!

 

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